A Certain Uncertainty

Action drives motivation, not the other way around.

I have learnt how easy it is to get stuck into a 'lack of desire' loop which might explain why I am so behind on watching some bald old fellow rambling about war since 1800 for 45 minutes with no visual aids whatsoever. Tedious, but that I want to do! More often than not, we wish to escape going through the pain of things like a workout, an article, a lecture, a social event, a task... whatever it is that you postpone because somehow you feel uncomfortable.* Today, I would happily buy a caramel sea salt Tony's Chocolony's and call it a night...

I guess C was one step ahead of me ❤

He brought me the chocolate; yet, the night is far from over and I'm saving it for tomorrow. We still went for a walk as the sun went down and I am planning on reading chapter 9 of this book, Can't Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds. *Other times, in particular when it comes to assignments or the blog, it is not about the willingness or motivation to follow through. It's about perfectionism. I pay so much attention to the detail of my words, I have started to see it more as pettiness. Sometimes I would start a piece of work and find myself stuck in a paragraph. Worse, I would not allow me to proceed to the next one before being considerably happy with the former - this tactic does not work well when left to the last minute. Flawfinding would be my downfall. I'm prone to get frustrated with the inconsistency of routines and time management, and tend to focus on what I could have done as opposed to what I can still do!

I have realised that there is a certainty in the uncertainty of life. That that we might never be fully aware of what to expect, and therefore we are unambiguously confident about the dubious character of reality. Thus, I can work on my thoughts regarding the outcome of things. Look at me, four hours and a half later, never thinking I'd press the publish button quite yet (or ever); but, I don't want to give another cookie to the draft's jar. This cookie is for you,

x.